A Virtuous Slut: The Guy I Bonded With Even Though He Compares Himself To Sartre’s No Exit (Where “Hell Is Other People”)

I honestly cant remember the first night I slept with Garcin, even though it was just six days ago. Garcin says he didnt slip anything in my drink and I believe him because we were friends before we became Friends Who Have Sex With Each Other And Then Engage In A Tumultuous Relationship. Sometimes you … Continue reading

What happens in La Paz stays on my blog

Shit my boyfriend said during our trip to Mexico…     To all the babes: dont wear a lot of make up on your face if you want me to lick it.   I subscribe to Harper’s.   In this instance, you might be right. This is a small victory for you.   I cant … Continue reading

“Hi, Id like a #1, animal style, with a side of Double Standards please.”

objective: via In n Out, order a double cheeseburger, a strawberry shake, and a slice of wisdom concerning issues in monogamy. All for $5.99. Extra ketchup please.   A male/female couple walk up to the register to order their meals…   In n Out Chick: Hi! Welcome to In n Out. How are you? Male: … Continue reading

The Prudence Diaries: The Guy I Bonded With Over Face/Off

DAY ONE 7:10 pm: Face/Off Boy works at the indie movie theater. As he’s giving me my tickets, he mentions how his last name is my first name, just spelled differently. We laugh about it and I mentally blush because I think we just Shared A Moment. I walk to the auditorium with my friend … Continue reading

16 Ways To Redeem Yourself For Liking Miranda July

For those of you I actually talk to, you know Ive been dating a guy ever since I drunkenly slept with him last month and had to ask him the next morning if we actually had sex. For those of you I don’t talk to, Ive been dating a guy since I drunkenly slept with … Continue reading

The Prudence Diaries: The Guy I Bonded With Because He Looked Like The Guy From KickAss And When The Lights Turned On In The Bar He Still Looked Like The Guy From KickAss

At a bar, sippin on whiskey n coke, after drinking mugs of whiskey mixed with mainly whiskey. Just got done charming two dudes with my “your cunt is in the sink” joke from Curb. One dude was this chick’s boyfriend and the other person I don’t remember…coulda been a girl or even one of my … Continue reading

Do You Believe In Life After Twilight?

objective: to find out what there is to Live For once all the Twilight movies have come out in theaters.   First, a poem I wrote while sitting under a eucalyptus tree during a sunset: Twilight. Edward, Bella. Edward, Bella. Edward Edward. Bella. Jacob. Twilight. Twilight: Eclipse, the third installment of the Twilight series, comes … Continue reading