Summer Of Love(?) Will I Cheat On My Boyfriend While He’s Away On A Farm?

School’s out…for summer. (Had to say it). And so is my 8 month long relationship with my partner, Garcin. (Kinda).  We’re still gonna be “together”…but he’s going to be farming in The Middle Of Nowhere from June until August and Ill be living in The City, hundreds of miles away. Possible premise for a Nicholas … Continue reading

I Came, I Saw, I Judged: Enter The Void aka The New Film From The Dude Who Directed That One Monica Bellucci Movie With The Nine Minute Rape Scene

  This movie is for people who: named Chapter 2 of their autobiography “Mommy Issues” named Chapter 3 of their autobiography “Daddy Issues” have incestuous (albeit endearing) tendencies enjoy taking psychedelic mushrooms enjoy taking acid enjoy taking ecstasy enjoy taking Robitussin enjoy taking DMT enjoy taking GHB enjoy taking LOL enjoy Hello Kitty fancy themselves … Continue reading

19th Century Philosophy That Will Creep You Out While Turning You On

From Kierkegaard’s Diary Of A Seducer: “I am a good-natured person who came like a knight to the aid of a young girl, and I can also press your hand in a way that is anything but good-natured.”                      (hawt) “I promise she shall remember the … Continue reading

My Boyfriend Just Dumped Me To The Tune Of A Bright Eyes’ Song

objective: it’s not you, it’s Bright Eyes boyfriend/girlfriend, both early 20s, are leaving a movie theater… Girl: That movie was different from what I was expecting.. Boy: Girl: …yeah, I mean, I understand it’s a film adaptation and the filmmaker doesnt necessarily have to follow every little thing about the book…but the exclusion of Swedish … Continue reading

3 Philosophy Grad Students Walk Into A Bar…

3 philosophy grad students walk into a bar…   Bernard: Hey, have you guys seen that one cocktail waitress around here lately? The boorish one. Phillip: The ol’ curmudgeon who always messes up my order and brings me a Jack mixed with petulance… Gail: The ol’ curmudgeon who Bernard wants to sleep with, Phillip – … Continue reading

Professor Benjamin Shaeffer is kind of a big deal

Professor Benjamin Shaeffer is kind of a big deal and he doesnt wanna get a real job.  the philosophy professor sat down with Symposium Says’ very own ex-stuffed animal collector to answer some questions… Benjamin, tell me, how does it feel to be kind of a big deal? [laughs] It feels pretty big. What’s your sign? Yield. … Continue reading

I Came, I Saw, I Judged: Sofia Coppola’s Somewhere

This movie isnt out yet, but I just saw the trailer: The title of the movie is pretty deep: Somewhere. Somewhere. Where? Maybe over there? Or over here? It’s somewhere, but really anywhere, because youll see yourself in the main character of the movie and be like “hey I just wanna be accepted too” and this … Continue reading

Am I My Bicycle?

Objective: To find out if the image/condition of my bike is symbolic of my True Self, kinda like how the plastic bag in the wind in American Beauty is symbolic of Life/Art/Selfhood/NaturevsMan/ThePlotOfMulhollandDrive.  I was waiting for the trolley this morning and this guy who looks like a hip Cheech cowboy who probly knows Quentin Tarantino, … Continue reading