I Came, I Saw, I Judged: Christopher Nolan’s Inception [MINDFONDLE]

YO. All I gots to say is that Christopher Nolan has now saved me thousands of dollars. Because I no longer have to pay ridiculous amounts of money to have a therapist help me sift through my “issues”. Now all I gotta do to help me deal with my Angst is watch Inception.

Inception was cathartic for me. But Im a Cancer and hold onto the past. So idk about you non-Cancer zodiacs. But still! Peace out Dr. McCabe and Dr. Bright! Laterz Dr. Wolper! And auf wiedersehen Zoloft, Paxil, Effexor and Celexa! Hey benadryl, medicinal marijuana and Flinstone vitamins, it’s not you, it’s me. And by “it’s not you, it’s me” I mean I met someone else, and that someone else is Inception.

Okay the Flinstone vitamins can stay. (luv the cherry Wilma.)

Kinda wanna ask Inception out on a date now. #nervous. What’s his type? Wilting flower? Bright and bubbly? Or smoldering temptress? Swear Ill satisfy all sexual demands without being too slutty about things and Ill keep my dumbfuckingmouth shut.

And ONE more thing. I feel SO strongly about this. Let’s get hypothetical –

IF the Academy Awards do not honor Nolan for Best Original Screenplay, THEN I will take a vow of Silence/Nonjudgment re: movies (ie, I will still go see movies but I will not express my critique of the movie to anybody in any way*).

IF I cant express my judgment about movies, THEN I wont have anything to say/my social life will end.

THEREFOREIF Nolan does not win Best Original Screenplay, THEN my social life will end.

*includes but is not limited to my diary, this blog, my friends, facebook, twitter, graffiti on bathroom stalls, and messageboards. said vow expires once Nolan’s third Batman movie is released in theaters

And one LAST thing! Yes, Inception should also win an Oscar for Best Picture. BUT, considering that the movie does not involve the Holocaust, Tom Hanks, gay people overcoming hardships, obese black people overcoming hardships or Noah Baumbach overcoming hardships, some other formulaic movie will probly win Best Picture. Bjored.

AND AT LEAST nominate Marion hey Cotillard for Best Supporting Actress. Throw in some awards for Best Cinematography, Best Editing, Best Original Score, Best Special Effects, Best Sound Effects, and Best Two Hours And Twenty-Eight Minutes Of My Life while youre at it. Thx.

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