Am I My Bicycle?

Objective: To find out if the image/condition of my bike is symbolic of my True Self, kinda like how the plastic bag in the wind in American Beauty is symbolic of Life/Art/Selfhood/NaturevsMan/ThePlotOfMulhollandDrive.

 I was waiting for the trolley this morning and this guy who looks like a hip Cheech cowboy who probly knows Quentin Tarantino, comes up to me and starts checking out my bike. He’s looking at it and asks me how much it cost me. I take a second to respond cuz I really couldn’t remember the price- I figured somewhere between 700 and 800 dollars. I tell him $700* [*I then immediately realize it was marked at $800 cuz I remembered seeing it at an SD bike shop and thinking “oh it’s actually $100 cheaper here in San Diego, and I know the bike wasn’t $600 cuz that would’ve been a steal.] So I correct myself and tell him it was “like 700 or 800 dollars.”

he's a little shy


He’s still scannin the bike, kinda crouching down even, gettin a real good look at it. He does some sort of hand motion which was supposed to mean “is the frame aluminum?” cuz I had to repeatedly ask what he was talking about just with the hand motions and he eventually touches the frame and says “aluminum?” I hesitate. I’m preeeeeeeetty sure it’s aluminum (some people have told me it’s carbon fiber but I’d expect carbon fiber to be lighter/don’t judge me). I tell him “ya it’s aluminum.”

 Then he walks around me to check out the other side of the bike, the front of it. He asks me if it’s a good bike. I tell him “ya. It does what I need it to do. It gets up the hills, no problem…” I pause, thinking of what else to say. I confess “I should take better care of it though. It needs a tune up.” I point to the chain with my foot. “I’m all out of chain lube even.”

 He’s still looking at the bike, and then walks away, not saying anything else.

 I started to wonder if that was an awkward conversation and if I totally buzzkilled it when I mentioned the lack of chain lube because maybe that remark was a metaphor for how I haven’t had sex in, um, a long time.

 After wondering these things though, I thought about how some people “see themselves” in their automobiles, eg, Im a health conscious/environment conscious/education conscious/indie movie conscious citizen of the World and I drive a Prius. You’ve seen the apathetic about Life but totally into Music kinda hottie who works at Borders and drives a ’91 Honda Civic with Karma Police stickers on the bumper and probably some sticker unifying him with veganism or feminism or both. People identify themselves with their cars.

 And then people pass down those Wise Words “you are what you eat.” Well, one of those ancient Greek guys also said “you are what you drive.” And duh. Look at my examples above. So it’s like, our Selfhood mirrors off of what we Eat, Drive, Fuck and Do For A Living.

 So, since I “drive” my bike, I got to thinking that my bike reflects my Core Inner Self. What exactly was I telling The World with my bike?

 My bike has 24 gears on it. Were the 24 gears representative of my moods/perhaps Different Selves? I normally only deal with the same four gears during my bike rides to and from Work. I think it’s fair to say I have about four moods throughout the day: sad, happy, mad and dopey. There are times when I have to go up a super STEEP hill and drop it to a lower gear. This doesn’t happen too often. And going up the STEEP hill is hard. This low gear droppage must be like how sometimes, life just isn’t fair and I have to go through a huge ordeal that shakes up my Inner Core and makes me question What Im Doing With My Life. I always end up making it to the top though.

 I think I should git that tune up on my bike aka visit the hair salon soon.

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